i am a scientistjohn is a scientist and exotic dancer. he has the compasses. he looks like this: all dark eyes and long hair and stubble. he is wearing leather pants.
- guided by voices
he has the compasses. i said that already. the captain has given him the black spot. this means he can be voted off the ship. what?
i'm watching pirate master with alaska. alaska is my daughter. you knew that already. pirate master is a reality tv show on a pirate ship.
there are two kinds of reality tv shows. there's the ones where the situation is artificial but the action must be real cos it's kind of dull. big brother is like this and so is the biggest loser.
the second kind is where the situation is artificial and the action seems that way too. everything looks like it's too deliberately lit, like we're watching the bold and the beautiful or something. survivor is like this and so is pirate master. the boat in pirate master, for example, seems not to rock. i don't know much about ocean-going boats but i'm pretty sure they rock. hey! ocean-going boats! you guys rock!
john has the compasses. he's making a speech.
'i have the compasses,' he says. 'you wil be lost without me. how will you find your way?'
reader: it's a good question. the shipmates look at the captain. the captain's jaw is set.
'at night the north star points north,' says the captain. he is eloquent in his simplicity. 'by day we can put a stick in the ground and draw a line from somewhere to somewhere else. this will give us east. then we can draw another line blah blah blah. if we draw another line halfway between the two lines then we will have north.' i may have lost concentration somewhere during this speech.
the crewmates look back at john. john is a scientist and exotic dancer. i said that already. it's a good combination. mind and body. i only know one scientist. his name is nick kallincos. actually he's a lapsed scientist. now i can't help wondering if he is also an exotic dancer. the first time i wrote his name, i accidently called him kick kallincos. nick, if you are an exotic dancer, you could do worse, you know, if you don't, you know, have your exotic dancer name sorted already.
jon looks back at the captain. it's night. the sky is cloudy.
'which way is north?' asks jon.
the captain looks up and so does the camera. it's night. the sky is cloudy. i said that already. the captain looks back at jon.
'well, i can't tell. maybe we're a little further south than we thought. but when the sun comes up we'll be fine.'
i look over at alaska. alaska must be in heaven: reality tv and pirates, together.
'do you, like, totally love this show already?' i ask her.
she looks at the tv. she is weighing her words carefully. she looks at me.
'it's pretty good,' she says. her little brow is furrowed. she is obviously impressed.
on which note:
love to all